When she was just 16, *Carrie fell pregnant with her first child to *Brett.
“We loved one another and he said he was happy to settle down,” she told The Sun’s Dear Deidre column.
“I think he meant it but found it hard. He’s always gone out a lot drinking with his mates.
“His lifestyle didn’t change really but mine was totally different. I was looking after one baby when I was 17, two before I was 20. Our youngest is 18 months.”
The 23-year-old, who has been married to Brett for seven years, admits that their sex life hasn’t been great for at least three years.
“My husband has as high a sex drive as ever – but mine seemed to disappear after my second baby. He often complains that I put the children before his needs,” she said.
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Then when coronavirus hit, Brett’s work immediately dried up.
“He worked as a scaffolder in the events business but, of course, there’s been no work since March.”
Therefore, the young family was left with no choice but to move in with her mother.
“We had to give up our rented house. Mum’s 39 and divorced – and she used to help me with the kids anyway,” she said.
“It was crowded at her house but she said she would rather we were there than live alone and not see her grandchildren.”
All of a sudden, despite the less-than-ideal living arrangements – Brett, 28, seemed much happier within himself.
After a few weeks I realised he’d still go out with mates but not get as drunk and he stopped always complaining about our sex life.
And as coincidence would have it: “Mum often said she was meeting friends in the evenings too.
“I should have realised, but the truth was unthinkable,” the young woman admitted.
Carrie was on her way to the park to meet a friend when an unexpected turn of events revealed the most unbearable lie.
“My youngest was sick on the way there so I went home,” she said.
“I could hear noises from upstairs and my husband was in Mum’s bed.
“It was clear they’d been having sex. I screamed at them both and told my husband to get out.”
Brett is now staying at a mate’s place – but Carrie and the children are still living at her mum’s.
“She keeps crying and saying how sorry she is, but I can’t get over it. I have nowhere else to live and I am in despair.”
Deidre suggested that Carrie seek much-needed therapy to process the epic situation, particularly as it’s “ripping up your children’s lives too”.
Deidre said there may be a possibility that she could forgive her mother one day.
“There is no excuse for what your mum and husband have done, but your mum sounds full of remorse. Understanding how vulnerable and lonely she probably was may help you forgive her but it’s a big ask.”
But she doesn’t hold as much hope for repairing her marriage.
“Does your husband want to try again? Is he truly sorry? Your loss of sex drive was no excuse for him cheating, especially with your mum, and especially given what an unsupportive parent he’s been.”
This article originally appeared on Kidspot and was reproduced here with permission